Male Loneliness: Letting Go of Stigma and Finding Connection.
Loneliness, it's a word that isn't mentioned enough, which in turn makes the word seem lonely, avoidant and dirty but it really shouldn't. As human's we are naturally social creatures and for a lot of us we crave those interactions: the normalising of life, that obvious offside goal, that crap day at work, or just releasing tension by laughing together. Talking helps us to offload those thoughts and emotions, if those thoughts can't go anywhere then they just sit in our heads like a trapped wasp in a can of drink.
Loneliness can often be circumstantial, we might have relocated, our friends may have settled down, a change of job, we might suddenly have become a full-time carer for a loved one or we might struggle to socialise due to our perception of self, or of other people.
Since Covid we have become more isolated due to an increase in working from home and a lack of employees going into work. Even our education and training tends to be on-line learning as opposed to workshops where we would previously interact with other people. For a lot of people, staying at home has become an unhealthy habit, it's like wearing a comfy pair of trusted slippers - you know what you're going to get, you feel warm and protected but ultimately nothing ever changes in your life and the loneliness and frustrations increase - leading to emotions such as low mood, agitation, a lack of motivation and low self-esteem.
England's Declan Rice, has been involved in a campaign highlighting loneliness and its impact on men's mental health. This campaign, featuring Rice in a PSA for the charity Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM), aims to address the stigma around loneliness and it encourages Men to seek help, you can read more on the article here.
Although sustained periods of loneliness can feel painful, they can also be positive.
Being plunged into isolation has been coined to the phrase “The dark night of the soul” a phase of passive purification - where periods of reflection can aid the shedding of old relationship's, thought patterns, or even old version's of ourselves. This can be difficult to say the least but also empowering – allowing us to feel stronger and more resilient. It can help us to move in a new direction. You can read more about “the dark night of the soul” here.
Loneliness statistics
3.9 million people in Great Britain report feeling lonely often or always (ONS, 2025)
58% of UK adults experience loneliness at least some of the time (Centre for Social Justice, 2024)
27% of adults reported feeling lonely always, often, or some of the time in December 2023 to January 2024 (ONS)
24% of adults feel lonely often, always, or some of the time (Mind, Big Mental Health Report 2025)
31% of adults aged 16 to 29 report feeling lonely often, always, or some of the time
72% of 16 to 25 year olds say loneliness has a negative effect on their mental health (BACP)
Ways to combat loneliness
Volunteering is a great way to connect with others, help build self-esteem and give something back.
Reconnect with old friend's – sometimes we can lose contact with friend's due to many reasons. I had a very close friend message me during Covid who I hadn't spoken to for around 8 years and it's been amazing to be in regular contact with him. Why not reach out to an old friend today and see what happens.
Co-working and body doubling, could you work from a friend, colleague or relatives home once a week? If they also work from home you could schedule breaks together to have a chat. Just being away from the home environment can help break low mood and loneliness.
Is there something that you used to love doing that you've stopped doing? If so this could be a way back into connecting with people through your hobby or interest. Start a google search to see if there's anything in your area relating to your hobby or interest, if not then maybe you could create something that would bring other like-minded people together. Padel has been a great sport for making new friends and networking.
Dog walking, but you don't have a dog? Borrow my doggy is a great opportunity to walk a dog and get to know other people and people on your walks – people love to talk to dog owner's on their walks, for more information check
Other Resources Worth Checking Out:
Andy's Man club, Men's shed's, Lions Barber Collective, C.A.L.M, meetup
Volunteering Hub's
https://www.doit.life/volunteer
https://reachvolunteering.org.uk/
https://volunteeringmatters.org.uk/
Talking to a therapist can also help you to make sense of the loneliness and guide you away from isolation and towards a fuller life. If you think therapy might be a positive next step for you, click this link and book yourself a free assessment call today.
(Photo by Dorian Labbe on Unsplash)